Its D-Day Ya'll!

War Eagle.

I like to think I'm optimistic. Most days, I know I'm more pessimisitc than most...Just really dont wanna get my hopes up just to get them dashed.

But today, I'm an optimist. I hear Alabama is gonna get caught looking ahead to Florida..And I also hear Tubby doesn't want to disappoint lonely Auburn fans in Texas who are buried underneath Con Law outlines. :)

Lucky Jersey---check
Optimism--sorda check

My War Eagle swagger might not be up to par these days....but I'm hoping for 7 in a row.

Take that Saban.

Oh. Husband is downstairs. I'm upstairs in Auburn Country.

And CBS is stupid. I CANNOT STAND THESE ANNOUNCERS.





WHOA IS ME. The smell of defeat is pungent. I will say Bama could have been a little bit more classy..that last touchdown was pretty asshole-ey. Whatever. We lost. I'm pissed. Now its time to look toward next year. And hopefully a better coaching team. Whether that includes Tubbs or not, I dont know. We will see though.

In the end. I'm still an Auburn fan.

But.....Go Gators. Get 'um next weekend Tebow. I'd like to see Florida take it to Alabama. I'd be ok with today if that could happen. Did you hear that football gods??

Happy Turkey Day!

Happy Thanksgivin' Ya'll!

In the spirit of the holiday...here are just a few things I'm thankful for:

• my health: if you know me, and my family history...this is a good thing!
• my husband: even when we're arguing, I still can't deny I love him
• my kiddo: he's awesome. best thing that ever happened to me hands down.
• my dog: she's terrible. but the best dog EVER
• my education: I might complain now, but I certainly wont once I'm getting paid to bust my a*&
• my family: I love them,...I miss them today..and pretty much every day..I can't wait till Christmas when I get to see them again.
  
• my mom in particular: this green bean casserole is going to rock. and its all because of you :)
  
• my new family: they have accepted me with open arms..and I can't ever thank them enough for that. from day one, they have treated me like one of their own, and I really needed that then, and I cherish it now
• my homemade family: from Uncle Kaleb to K...I cant imagine how I would have gotten through these past few years without you guys...it certainly wouldnt be as much fun!
• K: you already got an honorable mention, but you definitely deserve you're own bullet point. I'm so thankful to have you as my best friend. I dont even want to know what my life would be like right now if I didn't have you around. seriously.
• my law school family: I love you guys! Matt, Carla, E...you're the best lunch bunch ever!
• last but not least...my blog: thanks for being there when I needed to vent, or when I needed to tell someone how much they mean to me. Thanks Blogger world... :)

Happy Thanksgiving Ya'll---from all of mine to all of yours.

8 Long Years in the Making

I went to church for the first time in 8 years today. I'm guesstimating around 8 years because Hayden is 7 and I was preggers for 9 months, so give or take 8 years. Jacob has been sick the last few days so he and Hayden stayed home. I went to the Fellowship Church out here in Fort Worth. It was good. Different than what I was used to. The last church I went to was the First Presbyterian Church of Dallas, down by the Farmers Market. I loved the pastor, he was awesome. But I got pregnant with Hayden, and life happend. I'm not making excuses, but I did have my reasons. You would have to know me to understand, explaining them here wont make a lot of sense. But suffice it to say that I was bitter. And, let's be really honest with ourselves. I was 16 when I got pregnant. Show me one girl who gets pregnant at 16, who has everything going for her, who is happy about it. I was an honor roll kid, super involved in soccer, and had a million friends. I was seriously the LAST person you would ever expect to get into that kind of trouble. I think that is enough to make a girl bitter. I didn't think I needed church.

But now I'm older, and I have a little bit more sense (not much mind you lol). And I just kind felt like something was missing. I thought about it...and figured that maybe it was God. I've putzed around here, the blogger world..and a lot of ladies around here seem to have a strong sense of faith and I thought maybe that was what I was missing. So I'm giving it a try.

Wish me luck on our journey to find a good fit for us. The whole family is going next week. Fellowship Church has a great kids ministry program that I think Hayden would really enjoy, and I think Jacob will like it too. So we'll see if the search ends there or if we're in for another round of church shopping...is that the right thing? Church Shopping?? hmm..doesn't sound right, but hey...I kinda like it!

OH and If you're looking for my fit friday post, you wont find it. Sorry. With nothing but a couple runs to report..there isnt much to say.

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend! Yay for Turkey Day!

Happy Almost Holidays

Before I begin my FANTASTIC post. I would like to give a shout out to the Netherlands! WHAT UP GELDERLAND?! leave a comment...tell me about yourself! how'd you stumble across this place? please and thank you ;)

I would like to point out for those who are not aware, it is November 20. Not December 20. Therefore I should not be hearing Christmas Music when I'm in the middle of the mall. C'mon people. I know we're all excited about Christmas. But if I cant put up MY Christmas Tree, neither can you WAL-MART.

If you would like to indulge yourself in Christmas music, that is fine. I, however, will not be indulging until after Thanksgiving, silly me with my traditions. ( I know I decorated my page..leave me alone)

Ok, without further ado; here is my list of things I enjoy about the Christmas/Holiday season:
1. Decorations: I dont do every holiday, but I make a point to decorate for Christmas and a little for Thanksgiving. I really like all my stuff for Christmas so far, but I am really excited about collecting lots of decorations to put out with my kiddo now and future kiddos. My parents always had so many decorations, and I loved putting them out, well helping. :)

2. Holiday Spices: Thanksgiving and Christmas. I love Apple Cider, and I've been enjoying the last few years with Pumpkin Spice flavors. Coffee, bread, scents. I LOVE it!

3. Family: I'm super excited about spending this Christmas with my new family. AND I get to spend a lot of time with my mom. Which makes me super super happy. I don't get to see either of my parents very much, but it has been especially hard having my mom out of town. We get to spend the first 5 days of our vacation at her cute new house. I'm pretttyyy excited! AND I get to see my dad too. I dont know for how long, but I'm looking forward to seeing him and my grand-dad. There are some extenuating circumstances that are going to make that hard, maybe I'll blog about that whole situation, but its not fantastic. Small recap: my gramd-ma is really sick. ANYWAY I'm excited for my Thanksgiving too. Because sometimes even the family you make for yourself is pretty awesome :) and I'm super excited to share one of my fav. holidays with my awesome Texas family!

4. There is so much more I love about this time of year, it could be such a long post. I love the food, the colors, just all of it.

So, what do YOU love about the holiday season?


2 Christmas Pictures
1. A Texas Christmas
2. An AU Christmas (before they quit putting the Christmas tree out...and before they started calling it a "Holiday Tree"..stupid...what? so can we put it out on all the holidays? Memorial day here I come with my big ass decorated tree!)

Little Secrets

O.M.G. !!

I was putzing around on the internet, I mean studying the social scene with intentions of doing some sort of super smart study, lol, when I stumbled upon my inner-gay-man. Ok. Now this may come as a surprise to most people, probably even husband was surprised when I brought it up. lol. But I sooooo have an inner gay man living inside me somewhere (and not in a dirty way E/K).

Exhibit A: My love for Cher, Madonna (old, not new, new freaks me out), Celine Dion, Britney, Cristina....diva's in general
Exhibit B: When said diva songs come on, I cannot help myself, I either sing or dance along. I would rock some karaoke...I'm not saying I sing well, but I have heart :)
Exhibit C: When I see videos like the one below, I cannot help but connect with said gay man. I seriously loooove him. This is what I picture he looks like. And if I were a gay man, I would totally have some sweet sweet moves like his.

Alas. Here is my inner-gay man. He is my hero. Thats right, love me some Mariah too...oooh Bette..Bette Midler, gotta love BEACHES! lol. (sorry I can't embed it, it was disabled)

I have a holiday post for you, but I'm going to save it for another day. I need to make a rockin list of why I looooove the holidays so. Well, maybe make a condensed list, it goes on and on in my head :)

have a wonderful time watching the REAL sasha fierce. :)

Ill leave you with one of my fav. silly pics

oh and this one too

Music Monday :)

Thank you Blogspot for posting a completely blank "music monday". Thank you very much.

ANYWHO!

Lest you think all I listen to is pop radio (which lets be honest, it is pretty much a lot of what I listen to, but whatev, I will occasionally stumble upon something fantastic). Just so it is noted, I could do an entire Music Monday on my disdain for Beyonce's new song "If I were a Boy". ICK.

OK so for a really long while now I've been loving this one musician. To be fair 2 musicians. One of them is Gavin Degraw. I don't LOVE his new cd. It just doesnt feel like "Gavin" it kinda feels like the record label go ahold of it and made him do some "radio" tunes. Not very excited about it really. Ok the other musician is Citizen Cope. I heard him one day on One Tree Hill (the best music by the way. seriously. espeically the old episodes). I picked up his CD (yes, pre i-Tunes, I actually have his real CD lol) and it did not come out of my CD player in my car. I loved it. Well I still love it. And while we are on the subject of music found on One Tree Hill, before I forget, did anyone happen to catch the song Hayley sang? It was amazing. I found it on i-Tunes, and I'm tempted to spend the 99cents for 1 song. Its beautiful. I digress.

My song for Music Monday.
My Way Home

Sometimes I miss a step
I stumble here and there
I'm findin' my way home
If I'm lost then I'll admit
Sometimes i plain forget
I'm findin' my way home
You can try and stand in my way
You can say what you're gonna say
But I'm finding my way home

Fitting I'd say. I'm constantly in a back and forth about where to make my 'home'. I have all these different people trying to tell me where I should or shouldnt go (unsolicited advice mind you, when I bring it up, its not big deal). I'm just trying to find my way to a place where I can make a home, a life for my family. I dont want to move Hayden around like my mom moved me and my brother around. I dont fault her for that in any way, but I want Hayden to have a little more stability. We have already moved 4 times in 7 years. One time out to AL and one back to TX included. I just want somewhere that he can make friends and not be worried we'll move away. I think I have found that in Fort Worth, but I just don't know. Around this time of year I get terribly homesick. I miss being in AU, and I miss being near my family and now that means Jacob's family too. I miss doing dinner at his parents house on the weekends, and impromptu dinner parties with his entire family. I swear they make up holidays so they can have an excuse to grill out and have everyone over. It's an awesome thing that I truly wish I could take advantage of more often.

Ok. So that's your music monday. Sorry its a bit long. You get to be my sounding board for "finding my way home". :)

Picture Time

me pregnant with Hayden. Be kind. I'm 16.


AAND baby Hayden.
cutest. kid. ever. :)
can't wait to see what mine and husband's little one will look like. just gotta wait a year and half..then 9 months :)

Not so Fit Friday

My Fit Friday goals have been pretty pathetic these days. I hate that I've fallen off the wagon, but I just haven't been doing so well.

Stress is certainly a factor. I cannot even begin to articulate how stressed out I am about finals, and even the paper that I turned in. There are some people who read this who understand, and I appreciate that. But what only K knows about me is that I am extremely hard on myself. I am pretty much convinced at this point that I'm going to blow my finals. There is just so much to do between now and then, it seems insurmountable.

I understand that the other ladies participating in Fit Friday have their own things going on and experience stress for completely different reasons, and I'm not asking for pity. I haven't run in over a week, we've eaten out SOOO much. The only thing I can say is that not buying any 100 calorie snacks is probaly the only reason why I havent gained everything right back. I refuse to weigh at this point, but I now I havent gained it all back because my pants fit :) So here is to a better week next week! I swear I'm getting back on the wagon after this weekend. I seriously think that running is the only thing that kept me sane before that paper was due. I will test the theory with finals. And get these 8 or so pounds off! I WILL be skinny by Christmas. I WILL! My first Christmas as Mrs. White will be a good one. And I will not spend it worried about my weight.

Thats it for now.

A wedding picture. Thats all I got for ya! This is my husbands tie after it held a very close meeting with the meatballs we served. (I can't blame the tie really, they were ridiculously good)
OK...one more..This is why I love my husband. Because even when I'm taking things seriously he keeps me grounded. I love that about him. He keeps me laughing. He keeps me out of my head. He keeps me "me".
I love you husband :)

Tuesday Tunes--a day late

Monday should have been Music Monday, but alas, I was a lazy bum yesterday. And I would like to say it was well deserved. Very rarely have I taken an entire day off during the week. I will at least feel guilty if I do. But yesterday, not so much. It felt fantastic. Although now I really have to hit the books. Finals start frighteningly soon, and I am NOT ready. So the next couple of weeks will entail: teaching myself an entire semester of copyrights, making con law outline, BA outline, comparing PR outline with notes. Only 4 finals. SWEET! I had 4 last year, but writing didn't end so far from exams. I'm pretty sure our cite exam was decently close to finals. But this year, not so much. I'm done with writing FOREVER. OMG, that sounds amazing.

Now for Tuesday Tunes...which should have been Music Monday. I apologize :). Lately I havent really been listening to stuff that I want to blog about. Otherwise this would just be a tribute to Pandora.com. The most magical internet radio. Unless you've been listening to it for 2 weeks straight. Then you get used to all the stuff they play. Oh well. It still gets me through.

Instead, here is one of my fav. John Mayer songs. I know there are some of you out there that sicerely do not like him. I am not one of them. I still love him and Dave Matthews for that matter. Its easy to listen to, and especially when it comes to Mr. Mayer, it can be pretty soothing when you're stressed. So here is one of my fav. songs of his recent album. I think it is kinda fitting for the current state of things.


Is there anyone who
Ever remembers changing their mind from
The paint on a sign?
Is there anyone who really recalls
Ever breaking rank at all
For something someone yelled real loud one time

Everyone believes
In how they think it ought to be
Everyone believes
And they're not going easily

Belief is a beautiful armor
But makes for the heaviest sword
Like punching under water
You never can hit who you're trying for

Some need the exhibition
And some have to know they tried
It's the chemical weapon
For the war that's raging on inside

Everyone believes
From emptiness to everything
Everyone believes
And no ones going quietly

We're never gonna win the world
We're never gonna stop the war
We're never gonna beat this
If belief is what we're fighting for


OK. no explanations. I just like this song. If you ask me why, maybe I'll tell you. But for now, its staying in my pretty little head.

Now if I can just convince the media to stop talking about the election......Seriously, I just wanna know "whats happening in my kneck of the woods" Al!! Hopefully it will all die down soon. I miss the Today show. Seriously, I dont even want to hear the rest of the Palin interview, because then I have to hear the commentary for the next 2 days. SHOW ME SOME FALL FASHION! haha at least at 8..maybe then I can manage to stay awake rather than fall asleep. I will say I'm looking forward to the "ends of the earth" segments. Mount Kilamanjaro, Sydney Harbour....the 7 year drought in Aussie-land. I'm excited. I can't help it. They said today it would take Ann like 8 days or something to summit the mountain. Well she better get on it! I need to see some snow!
OK. I feel like today will be a 2 blog day. So you'll have to wait for the later installment for something more interesting if this didn't fit your fancy.

Hello to all my wonderful blog readers! I know you've been waiting with bated breath for me to supply you with another look into my wonderful life....HA who am I kidding? ANYWAY.

This week was filled with little milestones. I'm done with Legal Writing FOREVER! AWESOME. and I hopefully never have to give another oral argument for the rest of my life. THANK YOU! And most importantly my son turned 7! I really can't believe it. Last but certainly not least, my very good friend Crystal got married on Saturday and I had the honor of being a bridesmaid. It was beautiful. And I am supremely jealous that she is on her honeymoon in Hawaii right now. :) I hope they have a great time and a wonderful marriage! Now I just have to convince her to get pregnant in 2 years with me :)

So what else has been happening? Nothing. My life was consumed by school last week.

There really isn't much to blog about today. Mostly because nothing happend, and mostly because I'm too tired.


As for Fit Friday. I'm taking the day off. Well, the week. I'll be back for regularly scheduled programming next week. This week was a total bust, I lost weight, I think. Both of my scales (yeah that's right I said both) are being stupid. My digital one is weighing me 4 pounds heavier than my dial scale. But according to my dial scale I gained a pound, according to my clothes, I dunno about that. BUT regardless of what I think, the scale is what it is. I gained a pound. BOOO. Must have been all that eating and not eating that occurred last week. But if you had a week anything like mine, you wouldn't have lost weight either. I promise. So I am ending this post with a big BLECH. Hope everyone else had a better week! Thank goodness for a good weekend!

This is a picture of what the VW Routan website thingie where you can upload your picture and someone elses says mine and Jacob's kid will look like. Not bad I say, Not bad at all. I would assume the mouth area wouldnt be so large, unless I had an affair with Jay Leno. But since I dont see that happening, this is a really cute fake baby!

Tired doesnt do it justice

The first thing you learn about in law school is sleep deprivation. I kid you not. I think they should teach a class on it, call it AWAKE 101 .They would serve coffee and sugary snacks and there would be no chairs. Why no chairs? Because the second thing they teach you in law school is how to sleep anywhere possible. I fell asleep for a short 5 minute nap on my computer yesterday. I have no shame. It was magical. So in AWAKE 101, I would not be able to have a chair. I would just figure out a way to pass out in it. I'm not sure what the exam would be. But it would not involve sleeping. Or maybe they would hop you up on mountain dew and make you try and sleep. I would ace it. See above :)

I have always been a sleeper. Always. I would consider it a hobby. But during the week I have discovered how to run on about 6 hours of sleep. I usually need about 8. 2 hours is serious business for me. I'm not saying that 6 is bad. But I am saying that it is difficult for me, the person who needs sleep, to operate. Because, since I forgot to mention it, getting to sleep is hard, waking up is hard, and having a good, uninterrupted, slumber is rare. I almost never wake up feeling refreshed. Unless its the summer. And I woke up at 11. This 6 hours of sleep is hard fought, and rarely fantastic.

But I digress.

Right now 6 hours of sleep would be friggin awesome. I havent gone to bed before 2 in a couple of days and I wake up at 7. Last night I went to sleep around 3. AWESOME. And tonight, I plan on staying up as long as it takes to finish this paper. Read: I plan to stay awake all night.

I should also inform you, the day before sleeping are freaksihly busy. Work Work Work. If I got paid based on the hours worked on a brief or studying for an exam, I would be stupid stupid rich. But alas, I do it all for free. One day I'll get paid and still not be able to bill for half the work I do from home.

How do you keep yourself awake during these times? Caffeine. In all shapes and sizes. Soda, coffee, tea. Right now water is a four letter word.

Starbucks.

Law students should buy stock in it. Or any other caffeine based drink that gets you through the day. For boys I see a pattern that it would be those MONSTER drinks. They smell so bad. Like smarties, ground up, stirred in water and fructose.

OMG SNIFFLER IS BACK. SERIOUSLY MAN. I KNOW YOU'RE NOT THAT SICK. whew. sorry. he's killing me.

OK. Enough complaining for the day.

Meaning: I will not discuss the outcome of the election. :) You're welcome.

Voting: like Nike, JUST DO IT

I dont want to hear ANYONE whine about long lines, inconvenience, any of it. Get your ass out there and vote. (and by the way, its called early voting people. you've had 2 weeks most places, my mom excluded, they did away with early voting where she is, lame)

But please. Try and be educated. Lets not vote for celebrity. Lets vote for the person we think can run our country without running it into the ground. I did. I know that doesn't mean we have to vote for the same person. But, I would like to think my faithful blog readers are able to think with their brain, not the media or internet. If you can't, I feel truly sorry for you, and I take back my instruction for you to vote. Please dont, sit at home, eat bon bons and watch the election I would prefer that you not participate in. :)

I digress.

GO vote.

Get free coffee, doughnuts, ice cream. And be glad you live in a country where you're allowed to participate.

Music Monday

I often find myself identifying with songs. Sometimes good, sometimes bad. So I decided that at least once a week I will post about a song that I'm diggin' or a song that is descriptive of what I'm going through or where I'm at. Brace yourselves, I listen to A LOT of music :). It is something that I truly enjoy.

In keeping with the previous post about my boy T.I.--I put his new cd on my ipod for while I run, but coincidentally I got stuck in my car by myself this weekend and just had to listen to my ipod to get the "I swear I'm not bitter I'm awake" juices going. And this is what I heard:
(yes, they are edited for the part I feel is the most descriptive. please see who I am talking about, so if you get offended for whatever I do or don't edit, sorry, sucks for you)

"My Life, Your Entertainment"
My life, your entertainment
You watch it while I live it (live it)
I walk they follow (ay)
I talk they holla (ay)
Just here for your amusement
My life, your entertainment
You watch it while I live it (live it)
You waitin' for me to lose it
I guess I'm just here for your amusement

See I don't think it would even matter
Woking a nine to (five) would it be better
I mean be honest, would you care to gossip about me
Not likely
I guess that's just the way that it goes (the way that it goes)


--Sometimes I feel like my life is on display (not from this blog by the way) Like every move I make gets picked over by someone with a fine toothed comb. I'm not saying I feel like a celebrity must feel, but get pregnant at 16 in a small-ish town, dont end up sucking at life and end up in Law School. Trust me, people talk. More of it is good now, unless youre a jealous B (then you just end up hating me because I didnt fail, and just live in your own jealousy and become a "hater" for no reason other that the fact I dont suck) But I still feel like people are just waiting in the wings for me to fail. To fall on my face so they can jump at the chance to point and say "see, I knew she wouldn't amount to anything"

So songs like this...they aren't me wallowing, they are my way of listening to them and saying you know what, sometimes my life is your entertainment, and I might be here for your amusment, but I'm not going to fail. Be amused by my ability to not let your crap and negativity get in my way.

And yes, you better believe, if I didn't go to law school, and just graduated college and gotten a 9-5 job, people would have a hell of a lot less to say. Sometimes girls can just be real catty. As long as you dont "shine" you're fine. But the second you do...you're up on the choping block because you made them feel inadequate.

I'm not complaining. Just telling you how I feel. Now to finish, here is my favorite quote. When I was in college, I would find quotes, pictures, sayings, statistics and post them around my room. This one stayed up till I moved, right up with "Dont be a statistic"

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
--Nelson Mandela

Fit Friday on Sunday

OK. really quickly, this past week was a beating. Most of the week it looked like I would end the week having gained a pound, but luckily, in the end I lost 2! Now I just have to manage to keep it off. I would like to say thank you to fit Friday, I now fit into the bridesmaid dress much better than I had previously. Thats what happens when you lose 5 pounds. Hopefully by Saturday I will have lost a couple more. I was really bad this weekend...stupid halloween. But honestly, I'm not eating very much. I'm so stressed out and while I have eaten bad stuff, its about all I've eaten. And that isn't very much. That is totally not to say I thin that is a wonderful idea, but I'll take what I can get. This Appellate Brief is kicking my butt. Usually I stress and want to just eat, apparently I'm passed that. Im eternally hungry, but can't actually eat. Awesome. Well I can, but only if its a cookie, pumpkin cheesecake or Halloween candy. Again Awesome.

Don't fret, there are meals. Yogurt in the morning this morning with granola, sammich for lunch with Fat free chips...and a few bites of a salad for dinner. So two meals outta 3 isnt bad. There was much snacking and consumption of caffiene inbetween. And sometimes, thankfully, caffiene is an appetite supressant for me. So that Venti non fat pumpkin spice latte did its job all day.

Thats it. Just didn't want to flake on Fit Friday!

Hope everyone had a much better go of it than I did!